I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
only if we run a train.
done.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
she pinky promised me she was 18
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Randomize
