There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Randomize
