STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
