Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Randomize
