Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize
