I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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