Duck Duck Cougar?
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
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