She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Randomize
