can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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