We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
