he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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