i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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