Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Vodka?
Forever.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize
