I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Randomize
