I'm gonna have a badass scar
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
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