He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize