He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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