Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
