I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Randomize
