Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
