I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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