Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
