i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
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