so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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