is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
