the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
