so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
