all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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