I heard we made out
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Randomize
