I must be too annoying 4 u.
okay pat passed out under dana's car
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
