At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
