it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
There was a lot of him and a little penis
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
