Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
There r osticjed everywhere
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Randomize
