in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
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