Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
