I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
