I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Bring me that man meat
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Randomize
