Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
