So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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