my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
This is the high leading the old right now
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
