we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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