so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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