So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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