So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
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