Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
We were destined to go to rehab together
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
