Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
