For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
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