FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Randomize
