Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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