So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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